Memories etched forever..

With hope for adventure, with a smile of expectations,

the four of us tread our way, to a trip..though short,but unforgettable..

Bags packed, snacks stacked, we began our journey,

through state borders of Punjab, Himachal and Haryana...

The bus wound its way to the hillocks and hills,

it seemed all the same, untill we felt the slight chill...

Yes, we were drifting away from the rainless dry earth of the plains,

we were at 'Nahan', and as if under heavenly reigns...

The clear skies, patched with cotton white clouds,

The mountains, ever so dense;greenery an essence...

Four friends, four hours,

and there we were at 'dastar asthan'

We took a breath of fresh air,

Enjoyed the drizzle and the panorama of paonta sahib so clear...

Over the bridge, under which the Yamuna flows,

the road that links one end to Uttarakhand and the other to Himachal's rainbow...

From paonta sahib to herbertpur,

from Herbertpur to Vikasnagar ,

we looked around in awe, of the beauty surrounding us...

A warm welcome by a loving family,

no wonder our friend is so lovable, just as her folks...

a walk around the countryside,

sneak peek into the old lanes running side by side...

Then came 15th August, the day freedom is to be felt..

Did we not feel it through and through with a tinge of pride,

Looking at the gen-next..little school girls and boys?

They sang, they danced..

they recited poems from the glorious past,

we realised these were the days one is nurtured from our country's clay to a cast..

Off we were amongst the mountains of Mussourie

Stolen into some fairy world,

Alas..something earthly followed us..

yeah it was the abominable 'traffic jam'..in a swirl!

Nothing stopped our spirits to reach the destined destination..

There we were after walking uphill, 2kms and a half..to feel the slight tingle and chill..

All that was to be seen were the green mountains and the clouds cloaking the valleys,

the market was pretty much Delhi,Nanital, Mumbai..

Taste buds woke up to the good ol' 'Bhutta'

And before we knew we were walking through clouds..!

The sun went down behind the hills,

and our hearts sank as we were home bound..

Back to Vikasnagar was still full of hope,

because the fresh air, we were sure to breathe..

When time came to go back to 'City Beautiful'

all we did was sigh...

We knew we'd miss all those wonderful moments with friends ...all our lives

Valuable assets passed on..

The entire 8th semester wrapped up in a single whooosh.... the graduation party( we'r done with the B.A, out of the B.A,LL.B!!) and the farewell to seniors( which was surrounded by lots of drama and controversy) were enjoyed at the end of the day.. Another very important agenda of the 8th semester was the RESULT of the dreaded 7th Semester.. but in record breaking incident, we'r at the threshhold of giving our exams and the previous result isn't out yet!! So, now that exams got really near and we finally decided to buy books and xerox the necessary material.. I got some notes photostated for the subject called Business Law since it was a mixture of so many statutes that i deferred buying separate books! Obviously, I did not even touch them until the preparatory leave arrived and that when I discovered something..

As I started reading the notes..something related to government securities..bonds et al.. the impressions from the past came alive.. I read a name, my immediate senior's name( ya its her notes most of us have copied)..but at another place was another name..of a senior of a senior( super senior).. so you see how notes are passed as valuable assets!! Then I stepped upon something written on top of the paper..some senior of mine in his/her utter frustration had written the following couplets- "Chameli ek saloni hai...saloni ladki hai yeh Chameli".. !!!!!

I grinned..and moved on and after a few more pages..I read the following

10 roses

Card( via speed post)

a pack of fererro rochers

Bouquet of flowers

"Not bad..not bad..wah ji wah"

And I smiled this time..and moved on with my chapter..

Later i discovered a senior's name wit ha prefix to it "Lietenant" ..It dawned on me that he was no more. Felt ackward. How much he would have loved to have that prefix to his name, the pride of writing one's rank next to one's name cannot be imagined.. but he could never realise that dream.

At that I must have taken a long break from my reading.. Business law was no more on my thoughts.. Just some pages..not original..photocopied over these years, given to juniors again and again said little things.. About someone challenging one's grey cells to some nonsense rhymes, and some one appreciating a lover's effort to woo his girl...and about someone who was stuck up in the law course and was dreaming of holding a rifle!!

Notes are not just to read, pass the exam and throw away.. when you give it to your juniors with your share of scribbles and scraps, you're passing a new phase and beginning some one's beginning..

As i bid adieu to the 8th semester.. I made it a point to do my share of scribbling and smiled..

Finer pleasures of life..

Mornings-neither too cold nor too warm..just pleasant..just a September morning

Afternoons- those lazy afternoons when I'd love to just nap but would ultimately slip into slumber

Hug- A group hug..just mom dad and me

Hand shake- a warm soft paw within my palm..just Jojo

Leisure-sitting, reading a book,among hundreds of Larkspurs,Petunias, Sweet Williams and Dahlias..just so March

Crave-One bar..just one; of chocolate..and just mmmm..

Walk-Night, star studded..fallen leaves, and the clittering crickets..

Talk- For hours together..about anything under the sun and time just passes..

Sip- Coffee..and you let your heart out..just like that

Sit- On a bench,where you can aimlessly observe..just watch the crowd thinning or getting denser

Sleep- in mum's lap, no matter how grown up you may have become..just cherish it

Laugh- That hearty laughter and tears rolling out..just so priceless

Sing- Yes, its nice on the stage..but in the bathroom..just you and your echo..

Pride-When I see dad dorning the Olive Green..

Accomplishment- To cheer someone up..

Tears- just thinking of times bygone..happy times

Care- When someone knows just whats on your mind and in your heart..

Love- transcends into unfathomable depths and sky scraping heights..just so undefinable..

Smile- A resplendent something..that just lights up another smile..

And so many more of these finer pleasures of life..that we just don't notice everyday and these moments stay momentarily and pass...

कभी ..

कभी तोह तुम आओगे , कभी तोह यह शाम अधूरी न लगेगी।
कभी तोह जी भर के बातें करेंगे , कभी तोह बंदिश टूटेगी।

दिन रात का ठिकाना न होगा , इंतज़ार का येही फल्सफ्हा होगा।
गर तुम साथ होगे, इस दुनिया से डर न होगा ।

इस राह पर जो हम चल पड़े , कुछ पल यादों में समेटे ओझल हो चलें ।
आँखें मूँद कर कल को दिल में समां लूँ , आने वाले हर दिन की शुरुवात अभी से सजा लूँ ।

इस छोटी सी ज़िन्दगी के इतने अरमान ,
बस इंतज़ार है की ख़त्म हो चाहत का इम्तिहान।

This thing called 'love'

The day to celebrate love, is here..right here,
Love freely; say it; confess it..have no fear,

The fallen autumn leaves are no more there,
Its spring and the greenery spreads everywhere..

A shady tree, a cuppa coffee,
shopping spree, or sumptuous meals..

Every little thing about love, simple and sweet..
price charming and eternal goddess, is how they treat..

Long walks, arm in arm,
'blush'- as he looks into her eyes,
a' rush'- as their heart beats rise..

Its so magical, this thing called 'love',
Its easy and yet so tough...

Sweet poison some call it,
'elixir' of life, people agree..

What could be better, than knowing you're in love?
What could be worse, than staying so far apart?

What could be lovelier than knowing you're cared about?
What could be worse, than waiting to show it, and still...have days to count..

Bidding Goodbye to my four-legged friend...

Today, I think was the saddest day of my life..untill today my saddest day was when I had not passed my half yearly examination in Standard XI, somewhere around October 2003.. But, even on that day when my parents were shocked, sad and surprised at the way my grades had fallen; I had someone to hug and cry,someone who was neither shocked nor surprised and that 'person' who is no more there with me today..

"Jojo" ..I love you.. How you came into my life, I've already expressed in poetry, and it forms part of this blog. You completed 10years and 10months of a loving relationship with each and every person of my family..not just them, people who had never seen you in person but just in videos and pictures are concerned about you.. it only goes to show the extent of your loyalty and love for us..

The last two months had been difficult for you and worrying for us..I could never imagine not taking you for a night stroll or not seeing you licking off the tit bits of cake and 'payesh'..but there was hope until yesterday when I saw you in pain, in everything you did..and that's when I prayed to God to either let you recover or let go of you..he chose the latter and so did you..

So, baby you were waiting for me na? I came home and that's when you decided to bid goodbye to all of us..Last evening when you finished off three bowls of water and wagged your tail when I touched you, you can't imagine how happy I was.. You ensured that on your last day, you make my day.

I think practically, and feel that you left us at the right moment, before you could suffer even more..but emotionally, there is a void. The house looks empty and every nook and corner reminds me of you..

Not a day passed since 1998 when I did not take your name at home..and today, I just can't refer you and your naughty times in past tense. I was about to open a chocolate wrapper coz I jus felt like eating one..but my hands trembled. I remembered you, the way your eyes turned towards me and your ears stood upright on hearing the wrapper twist and open up noisily..and then you would want a bite from whatever I was having!! Thankgod I bought a camera phone this year, or else I would not have had those wonderful videos of you relishing mutton and gajar ka halwa and you chasing the monkeys from the garden.. Now there is nobody to guard Mamma's kitchen garden from the lagurs and monkeys and shoo off mongoose famililies.. There will be no 'beware of dog' board on the gate anymore..Its a drastic change Jojo. Baba, had allowed me to bring you home at the age of 1 month on so many pre-conditions, and when you loved him unconditionally, he forgot all of those.. He cannot cry like me and mamma, so he becomes quiet. You know how much he loves you. Mamma will feel sad everyday when she returns from school after a tiring day and does not see you on your little bed. I hope god gives us the strength and courage to fight this loneliness..

I can keep on writing about you..there is so much that I wish to tell..

I so wish god had given a longer life span to dogs, because I feel they deserve it truly.

We'll miss you, all our lives..May your soul rest in peace. Love you Jojo baby..Take Care, wherever you are...

Compensatory sleep!!

Staying in the 'singlet'- a single room( considered very special in hostel) as you are living independently, without a room mate is something I recently experienced. Well, with or without a 'roomie', I've got used to being surrounded by friends most of the time. With the chit-chat extending to eternity, time just flies and what's more..we don't feel sleep deprived!! Even the beginning of a 'healthy routine' with a morning run did not stop us from catching up on a 30 minute snooze before bath-breakfast and big tiring day!

What happens to me and most of us, the moment we come back home? Its as if I've not slept for ages and I hit the bed once and get up after a century!! Puffed up -reddened eyes, dreams and sequel to those dreams running on my mind as I'm in dreamland and at the end of the day I realise I'm not doin much other than sleeping, eating and shopping; oh yeah endlessly surfing the net too!! So, the question is what happens to our body clock when we get to 'home sweet home'? All's well, but I get petrified thinking that excess sleep makes you grow plump, because your body fat keeps accumulating in the real world while you're holidaying at dreamland!! Babies grow in their sleep, I've heard and so do we!!!

I've promised myself to go for an evening run with my dad today. I think I'll accomplish it i.e. if I wake up by 5pm instead of 7pm after lunch!!

"God! wish me luck! I wanna finish off with my compensatory sleep"

KOSI CALAMITY

The river banks which once would have been, for lovers-a safe haven
The river which would have been a business blossom for the fishermen,

The plunges into the river bed, the little naked boys enjoyed probably,
The gushing of the water as the oars scrape through, rowing the boats lightly.

But often the water wished differently,
It did not remain a safe haven and it ruined the fishermen..

The little boys pined to rejoice in the water with giant leaps,
But their mothers clutched them close and all they did was weep..

The river of sorrow, the story of pain,
millions marooned, many maimed..

Just an embankment could have stopped from hell breaking loose,
You will shudder and you will wail, if you're in the victim's shoes..

Destruction done is done,tears rolling over cheeks , dropped in the flood.
Its time to lend a helping hand, its time to stop talking and start doing...

emotional upheaval..

Silence isn't golden anymore,
old wounds once again are sore.
Tears are too less for the sea of grief within,
just wish my feeble heart reaches ashore..

What wrong did I do,
that I pay such a heavy price?
A heavy heart, a heavy soul,
times aren't all sugar and spice..

Hoping that prayers work,
hope that trust does not shirk love..
hope friendship stays alive,
hope this storm,this hurricane,this fatal blow
I survive...

'Freedom'-then and now

15th August 2008..Its been 61 years since our nation became independent, became free from the colonial shackles. Much has changed and much has not. As a 21 year old free Indian, the meaning of being free, I'm sure would be considerably different from the 21 year olds of the year 1947.

As I sit to think..I imagine how it would be to be a 21 year old in the historic year of 1947. On the verge of being independent, how would it be? As a woman of that era I guess I would have already been engaged to be married to a 'government servant' or a 'barrister'(8-10 years my senior)..or I can't think of the other categories of 'eligible bachelors' of the 1940s. Maybe I would have decided not to walk the aisle that early and decided to pursue studies,teach in a school or do some social work. For pastimes me and my girl friends would go to a nearby fair near the house or just 'hang out' on the terrace of a 3 storeyed ancestral house! And there would be this favorite time of the day when there would be kites in the sky,dotting the firmament with innumerable colours late in the evenings.My favorite beverage would have been elaichi chai (cardamom tea) and I would sip it reading the Statesman, in my starched cotton saree, while the baritone of Pankaj Mallik on the gramophone would fill up my soul.'Piya milan ko jana'..the song that magnificently brings about the magic of love, of hidden subtle love. Where the lovers are away from each other and a meeting of the two is meticulously, stealthily planned by them..But the romantic melody would fade away in a few moments with the groups of khadi clad men and women protesting against the British. And I would lunge over the terrace to see, admire and soon join the protest. How great that feeling must be, the moments with the people of India, who were struggling for the future generations; what a rush one could feel by just shouting out the slogans of "Vande Mataram"..

And now, year 2008..as a 21 year old, I'm waiting for my graduation degree and further a degree in law by 2010, no husband fixed up formally, and favorite hang out place is 'Cafe Coffee Day'. I would prefer mocha chino and Cafe Late` instead of elaichi chai, but ya I don't have an aversion to the latter.The girl friends outing is more of a shopping spree to catch up with our favorite brands offering sale. And the music is Mp3, I'm thumping my feet to the music of 'Rock On'..The late evenings don't have kites in the sky dotting it colourfully because, maybe the kids are on their video games, social networking sites or at tuition classes. I'm not on the terrace of an ancestral house, but in my little balcony of my hostel room. I read the Hindustan Times and sometimes when I'm running short of time, I check out the headlines in an e-newspaper! Well, there are protests even now, but it does not give me that feeling of greatness, it does not give a rush. It also does not bring about the feeling of unity..because it is for land that belongs to the nation. But, its not land being demanded by any alien, it is our own motherland getting fragmented by her own sons.. Whether Amarnath or Hajj why can't people accept each other's choices, each other's faiths.. The ramification of the clashes is just bloodshed. And the worst form of it is..that there is bloodshed without reaching martyrdom..The free citizens are not realising what they are doing to freedom. The politicians are far from resolving their own ideological differences..

What will become of our nation, with greater divisions being demanded by the naxalites and separatists? Is this what the youth and the wise men of the year 1947 thought India would face? I wish I could go back in time and change a few things,a few dates, a few decisions, and ultimately fate..

Happy Independence Day!!
Jai Hind!

Gazes of a lonely soul...

Gazes of a lonely soul, into the pages of life,

straying into an unknown world, stranded roads and surreal nights..

The walks for eternity,the satiety for food,

Just me, next to you, and all is good..

The season cold and bleak, turning cosy as we speak,

those moments of love, today I seek..

To have you beside me, to watch my steps,

to hold me close, when I needed you best...

The rickety table, where we dined,

the ambience, the aura coz you were near, felt so fine...

But I'm on the page of this moment,

I see you're not near,

you're not beside me,you're not dining at the rickety table with me,

you're not there to catch my tear..

Its a change, so unfavourable..I'm facing alone this unguarded fear..

All I need now until you're there,

is wait, hope, patience, as I await sheer love of my share...

I'll be there for you my friend..

When you would be in midst of happy times,
and you wish to rejoice,
I shall celebrate..
I shall be there for you my friend

When you're worked up and there's trouble all around
and when you wish to cry,
I'll lend you a shoulder,
I shall be there for you ,my friend.

When you're in the mood..
you wanna shop,walk or gorge on food
I'll be your accomplice,
I shall be there for you my friend.

When everyone seems so alien,
relationships seem in a haze,
your mind is a maze,
I shall be there for you, my friend.

Promises are to keep,
Ive tried my best to keep these,
Unknowingly I must have been hurtful,
Unruly our lives must have become,
But I shall still take you through the maddening phase..
I stick to my words..
I'll always be there for you, my friend...

Just another face in the crowd

A step out of serene surroundings,
Another day at work,
"Go on girl...", a voice inside me motivates,
..Step out of that door".

Crossroads, turning points,
bus stops and more,
Its as if busy life is claiming
from silence; its foreclosure.

An occasional blast of hot air,
not to forget -its black smoke,
Nevertheless a baby's smile,
immunes me of what happened seconds ago.

I stare out of the window, no open space,
just vehicles small and large.
the blowing horns, the screeching brakes,
in the entire crowd I'm forlorn..

What I notice, is worth so,
the millions of faces around,
From the smiling baby in her mother's lap,
to the skinny rickshaw puller,-pulled down.

I saw intently some faces full of angst,
some were curious about the day,
Many were haggling for a rupee,
few were cursing the jam on the way.

In the mumble-murmurs ,shriek-screech jumble,
about more than an hour passed,
nearer my destination was I,
and so were my thoughts..

I was not alone, not travelling alone,
not a stranger to those around,
We're all bound by life and labour,
I realised--I'm just another face in the crowd..

Appreciation for the performer

Its filling inside me, its churning..

Like an inferno inside the soul, its burning..

Its moving out like a river into the sea, its hurling..

Its in my veins, on my mind, running...

The rythym, the beat,

in an auditorium, or on the street..

The notes high and low,

Songs peppy and slow..

Personifying emotions myriad,

re-living moments bygone,

Hoping for future miracles,

Waiting for chasms to fill..

Breathless-the one who breathes music,

Speechless-the ones who hear..

BUT-

What is music to a musician's ear?

"Voila!! Encore..oh dear..!!"

High on love

The morning dew on a new green leaf,

The tree bough dancing along with the breeze,

The song on my lips,at the happiest time of the day,

The thought of the memories in my heart that always stay...

A smile, a bit silly, unnecessary ,but it's there,

A gaze, a phrase, unknowingly I see, in thin air..

The beauty of stars, I realise as I look up at night,

Mighty Orion hunting for love; a wondrous sight..

My love is like crystal, it shines with your light,

Your love beams through mine, everything seems so right..

Come away far from the frenzy of the world,

Come away to my arms, let our emotions unfurl..

Forget the worries life created,

shut your eyes to troubles we ourselves did beget...

Love like its never gonna end,

love as if its god-sent...

A matter of Luck

A walk with friends to our favorite cafe nearby gives us all a sense of euphoria...the unending chatter, the cautious crossing of the main road(I'm am very indecisive about one thing in life-crossing roads!!), finding out short cuts to reach the market soon, or just ambling our way to notice the tribal women from parts of Rajasthan working at construction sites( We really are in admiration for their white metal jewellery exquisitely designed!!)
On one of such days, we noticed a little stray pup and I could guess it was around a month or two old. I muttered some affectionate lines in appreciation of its sheer innocence. It hopped around on the road aimlessly,I smiled and turned around. A moment later we were startled by the screeching of brakes!!! And I heard a Sikh truck driver giggling-"Abey main bacchey ki jaan loonga kya?Parey hatt" (Will I kill you,oh poor kid? Move aside!!") The pup was oblivious of the huge vehicle looming over its little body. The driver had a hearty laugh and I could see his hands move on the steering wheel, steering the vehicle on the side to avoid the tiny creature leisurely squatting on the road. I spoke to myself, thanked the stranger for appreciating life, for being careful and alert. My friends joined me in our discussion about the humane touch,that touched all of us..our hearts,and our walk towards our destination continued.

The next day, again around the same time, 5'o'clock in the evening, we tread the same road,walked past the same tribal women, walked on the dusty side of the same road and found a carcass lying.It did not take us more than a second to recognise yesterday's playful pup.My heart ached for it.
What I realised that nobody can stop death, if its destined to be, so be it.

Life is a game...

When you hit a yellow dot ball continously on the squash court wall for about 2- 4mins(warm up) , the hollow rubber sphere bounces with life!! Gets hit umpteen number of times,yet bounces back and forth.. It brings a zeal into the game and the players begin" love- all"..

Love and friendship, I've noticed work like the dynamics of the game of squash!
I've seen it closely..the misunderstandings are like hitting against a wall...and the outcome of it is more warmth, greater energy nad zeal in the relationship! I've experienced it-first hand!

Life is a game..truly..do u agree?

Once upon a Deal...

"1..2.....3 GO!!"
-
says BIG Bro Bush,
"Wow!! what a race;" makes Manmohan खुश ।

It a deal!! yep a deal,
Oh पाजी , A New- clear deal!!

Its special, its cool,
agree on it, don't be a fool!

Chit and chat;
but don't put it off the rack!

We're friends, we'll be so forever,
Just this one condition; c'mon brother!

"OK, I'll ask, I'll discuss the deal..
I need to keep people at home happy, you see?"

There's Mr. Karat, and Pranab Da,
Several others..I gotta go real far!

We'll set the deal ablaze,
vow for creating energy..

We'll turn it out,
into a great synergy!!

........objections.....! there are many,
only time will tell, after withstanding all political zany!!

"Crime" and punishment????

The first line I read this morning moved me-6-yr-old Delhi girl shamed in class.
This year itself there were cases of little children beaten-'beaten to death'!
Physical or mental the pain is unbearable. To be stripped off ones clothing, and hearing the echoes of "shame shame"would damage one's mental balance. It is horrifying, that how a girl/woman of 19(the kindergarten teacher) could be so monstrous!

LAW is inherent in human beings. The idea of command rests in each individual who has power. But I ask where does human reason go, when one exercises power? What can drive a woman to punish a child by bringing her to shame, for a mere incomplete homework?
Where does the rule of natural justice go? Who gets a fair hearing? Are these concepts only to be found in books, kept in the shroud of ignorance?

The liable school maybe under scrutiny for letting just a 12th grade pass student be a teacher for kindergarten..but its not an excuse! It disgusts me that the woman was released on bail!
Whether 12th pass or BA,BEd, more so a double M.A-The monster is taking over souls...

A teacher, who is thought to be a beacon for a student in the darkness is fading into oblivion..the 'barbaric and savage being' is coming alive.
We need to get over it, sooner than it gets late!

Here I write some random lines for the teacher who I wish remains a teacher..

Could be anything,dear teacher,
she/he must be sleepy,
must be watching his/her favorite cartoon on t.v,

must be busy playing with his/her toys and dolls,
or climbing the berry tree in the garden which stands tall.

Just another chance to do his/her homework you 'must' give,
I urge you to live and let live..

Where the mind is without fear, the head is held high,
Do these lines remind you 'only' of the school assembly?( I Sigh...)

Remember yourself as a child,
and search yourself in the ones you teach,

Ask yourself a question-
Are you indulging in a breach?

A breach of childhood, a breach of love and care,
A breach of trust and a breach of being fair..

Think dear teacher, please do,
the only person who can make a difference is you!

Charmed

Evening 7PM, 5th September 2007- I'm in a rush..Two hours to go. Pack!!! Pack up, no not for a weekend get away, a competition!!

deAd TiRed!!!

I realise I need to put cash in my bag.OK done.

Now what?! Oh yes 'change', the oh so important "chhuttta", for my cuppa tea and coffee in the train journey~!!

I lay my hands on any purse I can see in the almirah, shove my hand into pockets and pouches..and discover a few memories, a few blessings and tears roll down my eyes...

I discovered a few 'cardamom pods'.Those cardamom pods which my mum invariably slips into her purse before leaving for work...And this little purse I lent her last vacation, was lucky to keep some..

A long journey was awaiting me and my team, and here I was missing home with the pungent taste of "chotie elaichi" on my tongue..

Evening 10 PM 9th September 2007- I'm glad with the team's performance.

My team mate won the best advocate..She says I'm lucky for her, I think Mamma's "chotie elaichi blessings" worked..

It is funny isn't it, how little things in life carry memories? How small gestures and habits build a bond and touch your soul..